There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
