You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Randomize
