Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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