What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
