i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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