She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
