And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
