just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
