It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
