no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
