I seem to have left my pride at pride
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Fuck appropriateness.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
