it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
