there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
