Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
