Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
He shit in the fireplace
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize