Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize