When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
