Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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