"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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