Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
