I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
