Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
