Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
