just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
