just survived the first fart of the relationship.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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