Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
high people should be assigned attendants
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
