Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
