dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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