I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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