I want to walk on stilts...naked
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I think we might need a safe word for this...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
