Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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