I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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