we're blogging at a bar
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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