Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
