I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Randomize
