honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
