when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
