Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
