we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
