So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
