You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
