People with herpes should wear stickers.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
