Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
