I wish I could punch you in the face.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
