Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
