Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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