her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
