i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
