I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
