You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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